College Graduate

Five weeks ago today our son graduated with honors from University of Nebraska in Lincoln. He now holds a Bachelor of Music in Piano Performance and has been accepted into the Master's program at Texas Christian University.

I was not able to attend Trevor's graduation ceremony due to the need to retrieve his sister, who concluded her freshman year of college in another state the same weekend. But my husband attended and of course took along the camera so as to provide a pictorial record of this momentous event!

Awaiting the entrance of the graduates

I think that is Trevor walking behind his departmental banner.

I think Trevor is third row from the bottom, fourth student from left.

Son and proud father. :-)

In front of the music building.

Outside his piano teacher's office for the last time. 

In August of 2011 we dropped a high school graduate off in Lincoln to begin a four-year program in music. This was our last view of him as he walked into his dorm before we left to drive back to Illinois. For about five minutes after this picture was taken we sat in the car while my husband tried to help me stop sobbing uncontrollably before we drove away.

Fast forward to four years later. Different dorm, same Trevor. In some ways he hasn't changed all that much. He is still my son. He is still frighteningly smart, incredibly talented, and blessed with admirable integrity and strength of faith. But this is not the same guy in the picture above. Below you see not a fresh high school graduate but a young man of 22 about to embark on the next phase of his studies and his life. In a few months we'll take a picture of him in his new apartment on the campus of TCU. I daresay the shirt will be purple instead of red. And I daresay I'll have another good cry before we drive away.

A Week of Goodbyes

My son is about to graduate from college. I was talking to him a few days ago and it hit me that as we prepare to have him come home for the summer and prepare for the next phase of his life (grad school!), he is in the process of leaving an entire world behind. For four years now he has spent the majority of his days in a different city in a different state. He has built a whole life there, going to classes, making friends, working, and attending church. He will spend this week saying goodbye to all of it.

So often as parents we look at our kids as extensions or reflections of ourselves. When they are little, we experience everything with them. As they grow, they do more and more on their own. But while they are still living at home we at least get daily reports and see them frequently enough to keep pretty close tabs on the landscape of their lives.

But then they move away. And sometimes days pass when we don't directly communicate with them. They handle more and more on their own. They experience things, small and large, that we will never even know about. That is as it should be, and is something I knew intellectually but was reminded of in a more profound way as my son shared with me his plans for his last week at school. I was focused on the beginnings: the beginning of summer, the beginning of his graduate school career, the beginning of the rest of his life. But before all those beginnings, there is an ending.

God bless your week of goodbyes, Trevor. And thank you, city of Lincoln and University of Nebraska, for being such a good place for my young adult to build his first adult life.

Brahms

Here is a video of Trevor's performance with the UNL Symphony last month. Much better in every way than mine! There are some nice close-ups on hands and face, too. There is very little that approaches the joy of seeing your child do something not only that he loves but that is a blessing and service to others. Thank you, Glen Korff School of Music for providing my son such a good home away from home the last four years. It has been a wonderful journey for him and those who love him!

Happy Spring! (with update)

Wow, a month without a post. I don't know if I have ever gone this long. I have been pondering the reasons, and I think there are several. First, I am writing more places these days! Here are a few of my recent posts elsewhere. I am quite pleased with this development, but also regret that it seems to be making it harder to write on my own blog. Time to write is a precious commodity these days, and I must admit that the larger the potential audience for a piece, the higher its priority on my task list. But I also find myself wondering if maybe this blog is moving into the autumn of its life. Everything has its season, and I don't know if Round Unvarnish'd is still going to be telling tales when I'm in my eighties. But who knows? Maybe some day it will no longer be "A Round Unvarnish'd Tale" but "A Much Rounder, Unvarnish'd, Peeling, Cracked and Weathered Tale."

So, I guess an update is in order. Several weeks ago we enjoyed spring break with Caitlin. Now she is back at school and Trevor is home. Ah, that we could have them both at the same time. But I guess this way, the joy is spread out over a longer period. This past week we went to see Trevor play for the last time with the UNL Symphony. He won the undergraduate concerto competition for strings/piano two years ago when he was a sophomore and again this year as a senior (winning his sophomore year made him ineligible to compete his junior year). Here is a video of his performance on the winners' concert:

Brahms Second Piano Concerto, Finale from Cheryl on Vimeo.

I have been sick for about two weeks now. Not stay-in-bed sick, but dragging-by-the-end-of-the-day-I'm-behind-on-everything-because-I'm-so-drained sick. It started out as a cold, but the cough is hanging on, and hanging on, and hanging on. I will go to the doctor this week if I don't start seeing improvement.

Our pastor had a stroke. He is only in his mid-forties. Thanks be to God, it was a minor stroke, brought on by things that can be better treated and managed. His family--wife and four sons kindergarten and under--and his congregation are praying many prayers of thanks that he was preserved in life, is recovering well, and will in time be able to return to his call as a shepherd of souls. What a gift is life, always.

In two weeks Evan will take his First Communion at Easter Vigil. I only wish his big sister and brother could be here for the occasion.

Under the heading of "what I've been thinking about," I happened across a video of Monica Lewinsky giving a TED talk on what it's like to be publicly humiliated. It was quite compelling and made me think of the OU student who was videotaped singing a terrible and racist song on a bus. Here's an article expressing the hope that that young man's entire life is ruined because that is what he deserves. I am troubled by the thought that we live in an age where someone can do something admittedly cruel and stupid but even after repenting and apologizing and trying to learn from the mistake be never, ever able to put it behind him (or her) because of how thoroughly documented and public our lives have become. I am not thinking now of Parker Rice--I can't speak to his character or the sincerity of his apology--but of people in general and the problems posed by the permanence of the internet. Even those of us who are not public figures (and so have not sinned in such visible ways) can probably relate to the admonition that "the internet is forever." Most people have posts they wish they hadn't written, comments they wish they hadn't made, pictures they wish they hadn't shared--and how much more dangerous is the terrain for young people who are still in the phase of life where they tend to think they are invulnerable. I am reminded of that picture often shared on Facebook expressing gratitude for having come of age before social media. Oh, to be able to take back that word, that tweet, that . . . whatever. And yet, more often than not, we can't. Because even when the world with its short attention span has moved on and forgotten, and the "sinner" is redeemed and going on talk shows and writing books, there is still the knowledge that the offensive thing remains intact, floating in the cloud, retrievable at any time.

It is a knowledge that makes the forgiveness of sins and the forgetfulness of God all that more astounding.

Today . . .

. . . I dropped my son off for his junior year of college. Two years ago on this day my husband took this picture of him walking into his dorm. After he disappeared from our sight I had a long, loud cry in the front seat of the car, my dear husband doing his best to comfort me before we drove away.

Today I didn't take a picture. I didn't cry. Today as he moved in to his room, I just felt happy and proud and excited beyond words to see my son returning to the thing he has chosen for himself at this time in his life, the thing that God has prepared for him and that gives him purpose and drives his days. What better place could there be for him than this?

I don't know whether this means he is growing up or I am.

Carmina Burana

This video from last month was just made available. It was taken a week after Trevor's performance of the Rachmaninoff Second on the University of Nebraska Symphony Orchestra's Concerto Winners concert. Here Trevor and the graduate concerto winner team up to provide piano accompaniment for the University Singers' presentation of Carl Orff's setting of Carmina Burana. For those not familiar with this work, the text dates from the Middle Ages and consists of a set of poems covering all manner of worldly topics. It was originally scored by Orff for orchestra but he later reworked it to be accompanied by dual piano and percussion so as to increase the ability of more choirs to perform it. Not everyone has a symphony orchestra lying around! It's an enjoyable, exciting work, and I encourage you to listen. It runs a little over an hour. Turn it on while you're cleaning the house. It will keep you moving!

(Side note: when not accompanying the University Singers, Trevor sings with them.)